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Photos: Gold Coast, Queensland Australia 2009

.... knowing is half the battle....

I thought I saw a peacock at the foot of our bed. I scanned around but I can’t find it again. I went back to bed and when I was about half asleep, there, I saw it again - the peacock at the corner of my eye. I slowly opened my eyes and it disappeared again. I half-close my eyes, viola! – the peacock appeared. And then I realised it was the shadow made by the flowers that I gave my wife this morning and the cup that’s sitting in front of the lampshade.

I remember when I was a kid, one of my friends claims there’s a ‘kapre’ (tree-demon) living in a huge mahogany tree in front of their house. Every night when he goes home, he would ask me to walk him across the tree. I thought, then, the ‘kapre’ can’t touch me because of the rosary my granny gave me. I thought the rosary has special powers because it lights up in the dark, and the light scares all demons. And so every night I would walk my friend passed their huge mahogany tree with my glow-in-the-dark rosary.

Few years had passed and I was already in college and my friend has moved house when my eyes met the same mahogany tree. It was full moon and my glow-in the dark rosary is nowhere to be found. I was staring seriously at the tree as though I’m looking for something. For the first time in my entire life I saw how beautiful and healthy that tree is. Its shape is like a man holding a barrel of wine. And then I thought, this must be the ‘kapre’ that my friend is talking about. I walked towards the tree, looked around it, kicked it, tried climbing up, snatched one of the leaves and smelt it… and then I laughed. Now I know that the ‘kapre’ my friend had been fearing all his life is nothing but a beautiful and wonderful tree…. that it was all in his mind.

And now as I think about it I can’t help compare how many of us, walking in this planet, are like my friend. We created monsters that we fear. Sometimes we create an entire religion out of it, causing us to loose our quality of life, loose our drives and loose our focus. How many times have we failed ourselves and the people that we loved because we thought the wonderful opportunity outside our doorstep is a monster waiting for a kill? How often we overlooked at something because of fear?

I hope that every time we see obstacle along our way, we take time to look at it, scrutinize it, and learn to know it as it is, instead of painting it a picture that we will fear. I hope we look at it in the eye, know what it’s made of, where it’s from, what can it do… and use all information to better ourselves/plans. Instead of holding us back, may our fear encourage us to go forward. As what I always hear from one of my friends… ‘knowing is half the battle’.

Photo: Young, Sydney 2010

... pretty tough huh!

I was looking at the door from the bed where my wife is sleeping as if I can see through it. I can’t hear the TV; my focus was on the things happening behind the door. I can hear steps, trolleys, voices and beeps from unknown machines. From the sounds I can almost make out what’s happening outside…. busy people seeking help and giving help.

My wife just had a surgery last night and now she’s recovering. The operation went alright but I think it’s too early to say it was a success. She’s been suffering from extreme pain around her abdomen for the past two months, only last night we’re lucky to finally rectify the problem.

We’ve been to our family doctor several times before this operation. He just kept saying it could be stress, and that she needs rest. The last time we were there he told us that it could be ‘irritable bowel syndrome’, and if that’s the case my wife will have to learn to live with it. I was shocked at how he sees things from his perspective and jump into conclusion without doing further testings. Could we be annoying him of our frequent visits that’s why he said that to us to discourage us from coming back?

She had two major attacks in the last two months that ended her in emergency room. Again, I’m frustrated at how they attended to us. They made us wait without relieving my wife’s pain. Only after I begged them to fix her pain they gave her some morphine. Even then the pain didn’t go away, she just fell asleep.

She’s done gastroscopy few weeks ago and the doctor didn’t find anything except her abdomen is a little swollen. Our doctor didn’t give us any medication to alleviate the swelling, he just sent us home. The hospital that did the test called us and asked what medication my wife is taking, they seemed a bit surprised how come she’s not into any medication… and I felt suspicious.

Only after she had an ultrasound we found the problem, my wife has gallstones. And the only thing they could do is to remove the gallbladder. They said the stones are too big to be dissolved - and now my wife is recovering from last night’s operation.

We are no different from the people behind the door, we’re seeking help too. Good thing in this place where we’re staying the help is within reach. There are cases when some people appear to be ready to help but only point you to wrong directions and made you live with the pain, there are some who are really willing to help but constrained by time and money. The reason why it took us few weeks to have this surgery is not because we don’t have the right connection and money, because of the hospital policy.

I just wish this doesn’t happen anymore to anyone.

We’re moving to another family doctor. He’s a bit far from us but I think he’s better and he does care.

You should also check if you’re doctor does care, he might just be there for the money. Or he might have so many reasons that stopping him from better caring of you. If this thing happen to you, don’t just rely on him, do your own research just like we did. Ask for different test that proves your findings and then present this to your doctor. Mind you, our doctor, he didn’t think it was gallstone, we asked for ultrasound and only then he believed that it was indeed gallstones.

.... things i learned from dogs....

Photo: King & Elmo, Sydney 2010

You’ll be surprised of how much we can learn from our best-friends. They’re not only just good companions; they are good teachers as well. One of the best things my dogs taught me is patience…. which I’m still working on.. hehehe. Anyway, these are the things I’ve learned from my dogs.


* It’s not a real kiss when it’s not wet and sloppy.

* Always have time for a nap.

* When in a park, roll over like crazy and forget about the people around you, enjoy the joy of being free and in wide open spaces.

* If you don’t get it your way, beg.

* Never bite, you can however pee on their shoes.

* The cats are here not to fight; they’re here to give you a good exercise.

* Barking doesn’t resolve any misunderstanding, silence does. Oh yeah, and of course a good scratch on the tummy

* You don’t dig holes for your enemies, they’re for your anger, disappointment and worries. So that you’re always in your good mental shape whenever you fetch a stick.

* You don’t eat rats, let the cats do the work.

* Always let other people know what makes you happy, so that when you lie down you know they’ll bend over to scratch your tummy.

Love Quote of the Day!

.... love is not like a train ride from somewhere to your place, because if it is, then everyone is heading back home and not crying alone in the rain... somewhere......

Photo: 2009, Coogee Beach, Sydney

Useless Fact!

According to the National Safety Council, coffee is not successful at sobering up a drunk person, and in many cases it may actually increase the adverse effects of alcohol.




Photo: 2009, The Rocks, Sydney

Happy Mother's Day

... it's about time we give thanks to our beloved mothers, for all of their support... for their love.. for their care... for putting up with all of our differences.... for accepting us, whoever we've become.

This is also the time to show our appreciations to our wives - for all the hard works they've put into the family that we truly enjoy. The time to show how we value the partnership, however different we are. How thankful we are for putting up with us even though most of the times we don't get them (some sort of misunderstanding), for cleaning after us, for taking good care of us. How grateful we are for walking alongside with us instead of ahead or behind us..... for just being the perfect best friend!

This is also the time of those ladies who are taking good care of young children... for guiding them, sharing the love those children missed, for giving them hope and faith. These ladies who are happy to put on the mother's-hat for children that got lost in the journey of life, for nurturing them and wholeheartedly welcoming them in their homes - a perfect councilor and nurturer.

Basically, this day is not just for those who have children of their own, this day is for all women who wholeheartedly share themselves to less fortunate children. For all women who, in a heartbeat, willing to open their hearts to kids that are needing love, willing to open their homes to kids needing shelter, willing to teach and share their knowledge to kids hungering for wisdom, willing to feed hungry, thirsty and lost kids....

So whatever they call you, mama, aunt, big-sister, little-sister, mrs, ma'am, today is your day... your time to shine! And I, we, thank you, for all the things you've done for us.

Happy mother's day!